Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Oh so random.

I have a jumbledness of thoughts today. Let me vomit them out at you.

We have a new housemate. My cousin Lindsey has moved in after my oh so very successful attempt at matchmaking was oh so very successful. Since she lived two states away from the oh so successful match, she has moved into the toasty toes mansion. It smells in our house, very much like a young lady in love. Which, in case you didn't know, smells like room fragrance and perfume. Add in some hairspray and you have the smell of love. Or, maybe that is just the general smell of teenage/young adulthood.

I have rediscovered the joy of peanut butter balls. The food rage of 1980 government issue food has now arrived at my house. Equal amounts of peanut butter, powdered milk, and honey. Yummy. I was going to take a picture, but my kids ate them all, and besides that, I was feeling to lazy to find my camera.

I have two good friends who are grieving loved ones. Tara lost her doggy, Stan, yesterday to what was most likely a brain tumor. It was heartbreaking.

And my friend Becki, who coordinates the TeenMops group has lost her daughter. Kari was young. My age. With two young boys. It is a sobering thought and my heart aches for Becki, as well as those two little boys. I would ask the question, "Why"? But the answer seems to futile, so I don;t even bother asking.

Esther wants to know when our Heidi dog will die. Weston wants to know if we can wave a magic wand over Stan and make him come back alive. All of them are now worried that I will up and die at any moment.

Homeschooling has resumed, and is no fun at all for anyone at all. I already want to quit. Marcus already has quit. He is a third grade drop-out. I keep reminding myself how many times I was a third grade drop-out myself. And how many times my own mother wanted to quit teaching me. And yet, here I am, with a great education (bad spelling and penchant for sentence fragments not withstanding...) and there my mother is, sitting in Ohio, looking at her vegetable garden and sipping hot tea.
I bet she does not miss the yelling, the constant search for the ever-lost pencils, or the chewed up erasers. I bet she is relived that she will never have to argue the value of multiplication tables or clear steady handwriting again.
Which is reassuring. I am only going to be a teacher for so long. One day I will have my own garden to sit in. one day I will never again have to hear two hours of whining about what would amount to thirty seconds of work.

And when I think of Becki, whose daughter has just gone to be the Lord. i feel guilty for wanting to speed along time. I think about all these random moments of peanut butter balls, new housemates, screaming and crying and ripping out of hair over the requirement of writing two sentences...and I decide to relish them.

At least for right now. At least for as long as I write this post.

6 comments:

Renee Morgan said...

Just so ya know Marme is not sitting and enjoying her garden this week. She has a granddaughter and neice visiting her "school" this week. Seems my daughter also complains about haveing to write 2 sentences too.

Patty said...

I tried. I really tried to teach you guys to spell.My garden is fading and as for the tea, the tea maker leaves to early in the morning to make it for me. Renee your daughter isn't upset over two sentences. She doesn't want to write one.

mrchromite said...

I am experiencing the same with my daughter Abigail as well. She complained about having to write "W" a certain way, she hasn't quite grasped the concept of Haste Makes Waste. She whined for about 30 minutes to do three letters. But of course, daddy won that round. KEN

Pilgrim said...

Mr. Teamaker does not leave too early to fix you a cup of tea. Somebody gets up too late to drink it!

Val said...

Oh no... Marcus is 8? That phase is so not allowed to come back. ;)

I am sorry for your friends. Those are sad, sad losses. Sometimes that is what it takes to make us realise how lucky we are... homeschool fights, and all.

Val

Val said...

Read other comment. That one will make much more sense. Um hm...